


Private Thoughts

by dijayeah



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Male-Female Friendship, Office Sex, Oneshot, Smut, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-05-31
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:20:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24471934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dijayeah/pseuds/dijayeah
Summary: She was always there, from the very beginning and every step of the way even as she became one of his closest advisors, but she wasn't just his advisor, no, to him she was so much more. She was his only problem, one that was buried deep within the privacy of his thoughts. A NaruSaku oneshot, that is a gift for peaches-jpg!
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Uzumaki Naruto, Hyuuga Hinata/Uzumaki Naruto (minor)
Comments: 15
Kudos: 60





	Private Thoughts

**PRIVATE THOUGHTS**

* * *

She was always there, from the very beginning and every step of the way even as she became one of his closest advisors, _but_ she wasn't just his advisor, _no_ , to him she was _so much more._

She was his _only_ problem, one that was buried deep within the privacy of his thoughts.

* * *

**PRIVATE THOUGHTS**

[ **Inspired by: DSF - Private Thoughts (Love Mix)** ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CxbCk5SRVHM)

* * *

_I'll always, always think of you_

* * *

Scrolls were messily splayed all over his wooden desk, piles of paperwork waiting to be approved and sent off in a few days' time. The thought itself nearly made Naruto groan in irritation as his blue eyes skeptically inspected the contents of each document that reached his fingers.

The whole ordeal was tiresome and as Shikamaru would say _troublesome, to say the least._

His vision blurred, his face tired and weary as he tried his best to lessen the pile of documents on his desk, paper after the paper went through his long fingers, and sometimes he found himself losing the count. Dull expression was etched into his normally cheerful and bright looking features, his brows knitted as he used one of his hands to rub the side of his face.

If someone would've told Naruto five or ten years ago that this is what it was like to be a Hokage he would've never believed it. But it was the truth and he got to experience it first-hand.

His reality nowadays was boring and repetitive, in peaceful times it seemed like his only duty as Hokage consisted of the endless paperwork that he was working on throughout the week.

Paperwork never came home with him and most of the time he stayed at the Hokage tower trying to pull an all-nighter just to finish his work before the deadlines and _sometimes_ in hopes of forgetting her presence.

However, most of the time that wasn't the case. Her presence was hard to ignore, making him realize he hasn't learned anything in all those years that had passed between the two of them. It was his fault really; she was never the one to blame.

Just as she was _never_ his to have.

He willingly gave her away to the man that broke her heart a handful t of times, and that was probably one thing Naruto would never forgive Sasuke. Naruto could forgive _a lot_ of things, as he always tried to understand other people's feelings and their reasoning when it came to their actions, even when it came to Sasuke himself.

But when it came to her, he couldn't. _He refused._

Sometimes he felt robbed. He felt robbed of the opportunity that he himself refused, but he _knew_ that if he would've accepted that disingenuous confession back then she would've been the one to feel robbed.

So, he rejected her.

Sometimes he wondered if it would've worked out for him. Sometimes he wondered if they really could've been happy. Sometimes he wondered if back then, there was at least a drop of sincerity to her words.

He could've accepted her false confession, went along with it pretending not to see her true colors and feelings.

_Maybe he could've been happy._

But for what Naruto knew it took two people in a relationship to feel happy, and maybe that's why in the end he went with Hinata, because she was there to fill in that deep hole he had in his chest.

She was there when he was desperate. However, Naruto wasn't happy and that was completely his own fault.

Sure, he had a loving family, kids that were making him proud every single day, and a wife that was more than just kind and caring.

But every time he let his mind wander it always brought him back to her. At first, he thought Sakura was just a childhood crush, but it changed quickly as his feelings blossomed into something more, something _stronger_.

Maybe it was her ever-changing attitude, her fiery temper, or maybe the raw strength that gave her the power to crush mountains with her bare hands with barely any effort.

She was a thrilling woman and Sasuke was a _lucky_ bastard, and for what Naruto could tell Sasuke did not deserve the green-eyed woman, _not even one inch._

It also didn't help that she was one of his closest advisors when it came to the political side of things. Whenever she wasn't busy at the hospital, she would always make sure to come in, her sharp mind and dainty hands helping him here and there, pointing out his mistakes and lack of sleep.

_Always so observant and oblivious at the same time._

What didn't help even more was the way she would sit near his desk, brows furrowed, tongue brushing over her bottom lip in concentration, innocently, completely unaware of everything that went on around her, unaware of the hunger in his gaze.

It pissed him off, it really did, she was like a sour candy he couldn't have, and even if he could, he probably couldn't swallow it to its fullest potential.

After all beliefs like this did little to ease Naruto's mind, as every time he closed his eyes, he had just _one_ image, and that image consisted of flashes of hot pink and vivid green.

In his private thoughts, she was his only problem, and that problem made his heart ache more than a feeling of strong sake burning his throat in a fiery path.

He swallowed the bitterness.

* * *

**PRIVATE THOUGHTS**

_Inside of my private thoughts_

* * *

Empty cups of coffee littered his desk, stains of dark liquid lingered on some of the scrolls he had lying around. His face was pressed against the desk, raw cheek against the cold, smooth surface of the table, ocean-blue eyes closed in an attempt to rest.

His break didn't last long when he heard the door to his office opened and he refused to spare his attention to whoever came in to disturb him at this very moment. Soft steps reached his desk as they echoed throughout the half-empty space, but he refused to open his eyes. Whoever it was, couldn't they just leave him alone for _five fucking minutes_?

He felt a warm hand on his shoulder, long fingers digging into his arm, nudging him softly as he opened his eyes almost unwillingly.

His eyes were unfocused, barely catching the blurry reflection of pink and green before him.

" _Ah_ , Naruto-kun you should really consider sleeping more these days." He heard a soft, albeit concerned voice, and his vision cleared immediately. Excitement rushed into his veins as he observed the pink-haired woman that stood casually, leaning against his desk.

"You always say the same thing Sakura-chan." He said almost absent-mindedly a small smile crept onto his features.

"I'm just looking out for you." She smiled; plump lips framed her small white teeth. Her rose hair fell around her shoulders with a small curl around the edges, cupping the sides of her face almost lovingly in an effortless manner.

"Thank you." His smile widened unknowingly.

"Now, now don't thank me before you…" Naruto looked at her, a curious look etched into his face. "See this!" She exclaimed whilst grinning, as she lifted a white paper bag that hung over her hand loosely.

"What's that?" He asked, his curiosity peaked as he scratched his chin in thought.

"Naruto, you _baka_." A deep sigh erupted directly from the depths of her chest. "I'm surprised you haven't smelled it, yet." She smiled somewhat awkwardly looking at the blond-haired Hokage.

" _It's Ichiraku's_ , they had the slow-cooked pork ramen as their dish of the day." She waved the paper bag in front of his face. "So, I bought it as a takeaway." Sakura brought her face closer to his, a kind smile adorned her face, her big eyes crinkled slightly.

He fought a blush that was threatening to creep directly onto his features, his wild, ocean blue eyes darkened slightly as they fell onto her lips. He almost shook his head trying to shake off the tempting image, his futile attempt at discarding it from his mind completely.

He wanted nothing more but to reach out for her face and press his lips against hers, roughly. He wanted to ravish the rose haired woman directly onto his office desk, consequences be damned.

But she was a respectable wife, _his best friend's wife_ and he was a married man with a _reputation as Hokage._

So, he couldn't, not now, not ever.

He swallowed closing his eyes for a second.

"Why are you here?" He asked instead, a hint of hostility to his tone.

"To help you, of course." She rolled her eyes. " _Hokage-sama_." She turned her back, placing the white paper bag onto his desk, her voice mocking and almost bratty.

"So, eat up before I take it away." She scolded instead.

He sighed and nodded in return.

And so, she did the things that she came in for. She helped him like always, without any complaints, just a concentrated look on her face and bitten lips that looked savory and sweet at the same time.

He almost felt guilty thinking about her this way, but he couldn't help himself, after all, she will always be buried within the _privacy_ of his own _thoughts._

* * *

**PRIVATE THOUGHTS**

_I can imagine you_

* * *

"Lord Hokage." The anbu guards kneeled in his office, moonlight fell over his silhouette through the large window that was part of his office space. He looked at the bright city, various lights and lanterns littered the horizon brightly, nearly blocking the starry sky.

"You don't have to keep guard on me tonight." He said, his gaze piercing and almost dark as he looked over his shoulder.

"I have important matters to deal with tonight and I don't need you guarding me all night, you are relieved from your duties until five a.m sharp." He said with a tone of finality, leaving no room to breach the topic further. He knew his own anbu wouldn't question his decisions, after all, he was the Hokage.

"Hai, Hokage-sama." Said one of the captains from the elite force.

"Dismissed." He said waving them off.

Once he felt their presence disappearing completely, he made the hand signs for the sound-proofing jutsu, his hand movements quick and precise.

"Finally." He murmured in relief. "Now there's only one problem I'm left to deal with." He said to himself, his voice dark and heavy, a small smirk full of anticipation curled at the edge of his lips.

* * *

**PRIVATE THOUGHTS**

_Touching my private parts_   
_With just the thought of you_

* * *

He went through another, painfully familiar set of hand signs and concentrated, closing his eyes for a brief moment. _A kage bunshin appeared._

Perhaps it was the alcohol or maybe even the fatigue of working endless days and nights at the Hokage tower trying to meet the deadlines, but he couldn't help himself, his eyelids fell heavy with desire, _desire for the woman he wanted the most._

He replayed the familiar scene that he encountered during the day, imagining the brightness of her eyes, the deep shade of pink that was her hair. The lithe curves on her body, that were covered by an annoying piece of fabric. A piece of fabric that had the Uchiha clan symbol etched onto it and he wished he could burn it away from existence using his own eyes.

A puff of smoke dissipated behind him and he felt soft hands snaking around his waist, soft, curvy body pressed flush against his back and he nearly groaned feeling her so close to him.

"Sakura…" He rasped darkly, feeling one of her hands slide down his crotch. "Mmm?" Her sultry voice reverberated directly through the entirety of his body, causing his breath to hitch, as a small tinge of heat pulsed and coiled at the very bottom of his stomach.

" _Touch me_." He commanded his voice laced with the darkness that conquered the night itself. "As you say, _Hokage-sama_." She used his title mockingly and that only caused further flames within his body.

He burned with _need,_ his eyes the color of aquamarine waters.

Her hand dipped under the waistband of his pants effortlessly as if she had done this countless of times already and he growled lowly when she cupped the increasing bulge that hid beneath his pants and boxers.

"So hard already, and I've barely touched you, _Hokage-sama_." She mocked him again, her voice even lower as it ghosted past the tips of his ears.

"Fuck _I_ -" He hissed with a silent curse when her hand dipped under his boxers, her long fingers wrapped around his cock and she gave him a few, painfully long strokes.

"Do you want me to do anything else?" She asked coyly and he could feel her smiling behind him, her hand never stopped, the painfully slow rhythm always kept him aware of her movements.

"I want to _fuck you_." He hissed flipping them over, the lower part of her back dipped into the edge of his desk roughly.

"Then _do it_." She encouraged him, a sultry look in her eternally glowing, emerald eyes. "If you _can_ , that is." She teased him, the tip of her tongue brushing past her bottom lip distractively.

* * *

**PRIVATE THOUGHTS**

_I can't help but touch myself_   
_That's why I want you so bad_

* * *

"You are not going _anywhere_ this time." He growled aggressively against her neck, his short, blond hair tickling her exposed skin.

"Hmm." She mused thoughtfully, feeling his teeth against her skin, her hand still stroking his length with an increasing speed. "Not afraid _Hinata-chan_ is going to find out?" she smirked darkly feeling his teeth digging deeper into her skin, leaving a fresh set of marks. A small moan escaped from her bruised throat.

" _No_." He rasped against her skin, his breath leaving goose-bumps all over. " _However_ , you are going to find out what it's like getting fucked by a Hokage." He said with finality as she hissed under his rough tone.

"Now _shut up_ and let me _fuck you, Haruno_." He refused to call her by her newly acquired surname, _no, in fact,_ he preferred the old one.

She gasped when he pressed her flat against the table, one of his hands grabbing her by the pink, short tresses as she looked into his blue midnight eyes, her own eyes full of surprise. Her hand lost contact with his pulsing length and she nearly growled in irritation.

He pressed his lips roughly against hers, imagining and prolonging the scene that happened previously in his office today. Her mouth obediently molded against his, lips soft and plump as he grasped her tongue with his own.

 _It almost felt like a real thing._ _**Almost**_ _._

He moved away for a second, admiring the image right in front of his eyes, she looked at him with lust-induced eyes, short, pink hair disheveled and messy against the smooth surface of his desk, her body splayed elegantly amongst the pile of urgent documents that he had no time to deal with.

Her form illuminated by the bright lights that shone through his ceiling-high windows, reaching even the highest point of the city – Hokage tower. Her lips were wet and swollen as her chest was rising up and down erratically.

" _Kami_ , you have no business looking like this." He whispered into the night, his tone less dark. " _Do you like tempting married men?_ " He asked, his voice, once again filled with blackness to the brim.

She moaned explicitly in response.

* * *

**PRIVATE THOUGHTS**

_My love... Yeah Can't get my mind off you_   
_I think I might be obsessed_   
_The very thought of you_   
_Makes me wanna get undressed_

* * *

Truth to be told Naruto was obsessed with the pink-haired woman to the very point where he would sleep calmly near his wife at night, his dreams filled with naughty images of the former woman.

He would feel guilty at times, but his guilt quickly vanished away with the blue ocean tides when laid down onto his desk in her full glory, spread out and whimpering under his ministrations.

His hands worked quickly, discarding off the useless fabric that hung around her skin annoyingly. His hands cupped her exposed mounds, feeling the soft flesh beneath his fingertips, rosy nipples hard against his skin.

He squeezed almost roughly, and his cock jumped with anticipation at the sensation when she hissed in pleasure, teeth sinking into her bottom lip deliciously.

Her hand dipped into his golden hair, fingers digging into his scalp as she pressed him closer to her body almost desperately.

" _Touch me!_ " she cried out pushing his face directly into her chest and almost sighed in relief when she felt a hot appendage curling around her rosy nipple. "Fuck, _Sakura_." He grunted, his hot mouth twirling against the hard pebble of skin as he used his other hand to feel the curves of her body, exploring her almost carefully, even as his touch held a hint of possessiveness to it.

"I want you inside of me." Her words dissipated into the darkness of the room as he yanked down her pants, pushing them away completely, his tongue never leaving her abused chest. " _Kami_ , don't say things like that so easily." He warned her with a final growl as he discarded off the last piece of fabric on her body.

"Please..." Her breath caught into her throat as he tugged her legs closer to him, his own body now positioned in between her legs. He pulled the waistband of his pants and boxers all at once with one swift movement, revealing a hard, long, and thick member that pulsed with continuous excitement.

His fingers touched her heat, playful, light touches up and down as she moaned again and again, writhing under his touches, her back arched, her head pushed back, lips forming an 'o' as her heels dug into his back almost painfully. He coaxed her to submit, his fingers pressing deeper against the most secret part of her places.

* * *

**PRIVATE THOUGHTS**

_I wanna feel your heart and soul_   
_Inside of me_   
_Let's make a deal_   
_You roll, I lick_   
_And we can go flying into ecstasy_

* * *

He didn't wait for her to say anything else as he spread her legs out completely, ravishing the image in front of his eyes. The ocean blue eyes darkened significantly, a glimmer of want and lust shined through them almost transparently.

He grasped his cock with one hand, using the other one to pin her wrists at the end of the table, behind her head with an iron grip. She didn't mind, only encouraging him with a growl of her own.

He positioned his length at her entrance and swiftly pushed in, a silent curse fell from his lips, feeling her twitch against his cock. She was wet, burning hot and tight, at least that's how he _imagined_ her to be.

He didn't wait for her to adjust, afraid that he might lose his control of the clone that he so carefully crafted in the darkest depths of his mind. She was his only private pleasure, one that he wasn't willing to give away or share.

He pushed in almost relentlessly, a rapid rhythm he set for himself. There was almost a hint of desperation to his movements as his muscles spasmed against her in the moments of heat and desire.

He was already breathless as it was, but her body was igniting all sorts of flames within his body and his lungs felt like they were on fire.

He grabbed her by the buttocks, rough fingertips pressing into the plum flesh, letting him lose his hold over her dainty wrists.

She moaned and cried under him, the sounds a complete bliss to his ears as her hands pushed him closer to her. His face was buried into the crook of her abused neck, her short locks tickled the side of his marked cheek as he struggled to inhale and keep his control over the clone beneath him.

" _Ah, fuck_ …" silent curses fell out of his mouth one after another as he rammed in continuously, her heat surging him to stay in longer, crawling and sucking him in. "Sakura…" he whispered into her ear as he bit her earlobe aggressively.

His bloodstream was filled with her, just as much as his office space was filled with her gasps and pleads to go faster. He was intoxicated by this forsaken woman that just refused to leave his mind.

His throat grew even tighter at the sensation that coiled at the tip of his length.

_And he did._

The delirious sensation finally kicked in, the feeling full of ecstasy as his seed spilled into her and she gladly and greedily swallowed it with her body. His veins were full of that chemical feeling one would call love.

"Fuck, _don't_ look at me _like that_." He closed his eyes, almost refusing to see any more of her. His lips fell over hers roughly, with passion, one last time before she dissipated completely just like most of his daydreams. He lost control and she was his price.

His face was full of tenderness that he only dared to show in front of her, however, his eyes were dull and empty, his exhaustion taking a toll on him completely.

It didn't take too long for him to start feeling empty, because the Sakura he wanted existed only in the dark corners of his _private thoughts._ His mood sunk low, followed by a dull ache of longing.

He shook his head chasing the heavy thoughts away.

_And maybe in a way it was bittersweet._

* * *

**PRIVATE THOUGHTS**

I wanna be with you  
In spite of what my heart says  
I guess I want you too bad

* * *

"Naruto-kun, are you alright?" He heard Hinata's soft voice the following morning after he left his office space. His eyes tired, but his body was at ease.

"Yeah, why are you asking, Hinata-chan?" He answered her just as softly, his expression somewhere in between puzzled and exhausted.

"The anbu you sent off last night came by our house saying Hokage dismissed them, so they insisted to guard me and the kids instead." A tinge of confusion was etched into her gentle features, she looked at him questioningly, pale, violet eyes narrowing.

"Ah, I sent them off since I had to meet up with Sasuke last night, he came back with the report," Naruto said, scratching the back of his head almost uncomfortably, it was the best excuse he could come up with and it _always_ worked. However, a look of uncertainty danced across his face just for a few moments, _he was never a good liar._

A glint of suspicion flashed through the dark-haired woman's eyes before she smiled at him, somewhat feeling more at ease.

"Oh, Sakura-chan must be really happy since Sasuke-kun is finally home for once!" She still held the kind smile she had on her face, looking at her husband from underneath due to their difference in height. Naruto nearly shivered at the mention of her name, the small pang of guilt he felt washing over him in a tide.

"Yeah, _very_." His voice a mere whisper as the words came out from his lips. He smiled back, almost bitterly so, his mind tucking away the painful grudges, while he kept walking further down the corridor of their home.

He would always envy the raven-haired man who won her heart from the beginning, without any effort, without even trying.

Maybe that's why Naruto had always loved Sakura because even though his love would always remain one-sided, he could not help but fall in love with the rose haired woman over and over again.

She was one of a kind and Sasuke was a _lucky bastard_ after all.

* * *

**PRIVATE THOUGHTS**

_I'll always, always think of you_


End file.
